F is for Forgiveness

I’ve had my share of disappointments and betrayals. My heart still stings when something or someone triggers a painful memory. Anger, bitterness and resentment thrive when you believe you’ve been wronged. Those emotions feed on each other and impact your interactions with others but more importantly, they affect your ability to grow. Buddha describes it this way:

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die”

I read something years ago that changed the way I thought about forgiveness. I learned that forgiveness is something you do for yourself. It’s not about the other person. It’s in the process of forgiveness that you “let go” and move on. It doesn’t mean  you condone the other person’s behavior, or that you forget what happened. But forgiveness allows you to get on with your life and move forward.

I recently wrote a coming of age story – my own. A memoir that spans the first 22 years of my life. My early adult years were tumultuous, filled with adventures and riddled with pain, sorrow and lost dreams. As I wrote, I laughed and cried as the memories came flooding back. I realized there was something I needed to do – a gift I needed to give myself from all those years ago. I needed to forgive myself – for a failed marriage, a lost love, a lost dream. The writing was cathartic but it has been in the process of forgiving myself that I can finally let go, and be free.

“Forgiving does not erase the bitter past.  A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Instead, forgiving what we cannot change creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of our past into a hope for our future.” ~ Lewis Smedes

~ Namaste


14 thoughts on ““F” is for FORGIVENESS

  1. Namaste, and Peace.

    Your thoughts and vibrations gave me chills. This is such a humbling read, and packs such a powerful punch — one that many of us too often forget. Indeed forgiveness is for me to go on in life with holding poison in my veins.

    Many best wishes for your future! ♥

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I feel guilty now – so ironic that my F post today is actually a really angry and mean one. I’m still holding on to the anger of something that happened years ago. I’ve moved on from the people but it still gets me so upset. I guess I know what I need to work on. Sometimes forgiveness is so hard!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Really well written, and a great message that I need to remember more often. I didn’t speak to my sister for two years because of a massive fight we had that she never apologized for, but despite still feeling a little bitter about that (I haven’t quite let it go, obviously, oops), we’re back in each other’s lives and I’m sad about the lost time, but hopeful for the future. Good luck with the rest of AtoZ!
    Jamie Lyn Weigt | Writing Dragons Blog

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve watched you grow into this amazing, loving person. I’m proud of the way you keep searching for answers to life’s lessons. You’re ability to step up and lead. Am I surprised by all of your talent? Heck no, you are my daughter after all.
    Hugs Mom

    Liked by 1 person

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